Time to bring in the closer

Has there ever been something you have to do that you just didn't want to? Go to college? Get a job? Read a book? Ask for directions? Shovel the snow off the sidewalk? Go to Church Sunday morning? Go to sports or drama practice after a long day?
Yup, I been there. Right now, there is something I have to do, that my friend is pushing me to do, and I don't want to do it. I made a note in my journal that I had to have it done... yesterday. And yet today, I have left it unfinished.
If you know me, you know I procrastinate, but this is different. I don't know why, but there is a fear in these things that isn't present when I put off cleaning my room, or doing my homework. I am almost as afraid of doing these things as I am of not doing them, or screwing them up.
I know I need to prepare to serve my mission, but every time I bow my head to pray, or open my scriptures, or journal, I get nervous, anxious, and worried. I am frightened that I will do something wrong in preparation or in the field that will damage those around me.
These fears are unpractical. What GIVES me strength in preparing for my mission are the very things I am afraid of doing wrong. So how bout this, fear. I pray for strength, guidance, and direction before I do anything else.
I know from experience that through fasting and prayer, I gain strength to do those things I must, whether spiritual or of the world. It seems strange that by seemingly depriving myself of essential ingredients for life (food and water) bring me strength. The amazing thing that I have experienced is that I feel better, happier, less burdened when "starving." I am more in tune with the Spirit of God, and my willingness to sacrifice these requirements of temporal life works as evidence of my commitment and devotion to Heavenly Father. Though I LOVE eating, as soon as it became habit for me to spend the first weekend of every month fasting, it was easy. I didn't feel hungry, or thirsty, and within 3 months, I was routinely running, lifting, or playing volley ball, football, or ultimate frisbee 23 hours into my fast. I more readily read and understood scripture, kept a journal, and followed commandments better than ever before.
So I guess this is a round about way of me saying I need to make a call.