There are numerous hot button issues in the socio-political sphere of the US right now. Women's Rights, Gay Marriage, Legalization of Marijuana, Ebola, Healthcare are the ones that immediately come to mind. Abortion is still hotly debated. Minimum wage is a near constant struggle. Immigration is always a popular arguing point.
The topic I would like to focus on today is gay marriage, specifically as it relates to religion. I attempt to lead a religious life. I will freely admit that I am constantly falling short of my potential. I still hope for and work towards progressing and improving. So keep some things in mind here; simply because I voice something as a reason behind my stance on the topic does not mean that I fully exemplify it, but that it is something I hope to be applying in my life. Additionally, this is as I understand it to be, not the official position of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. To business!
I do not know the chemical or psychological process which influences attraction. I have had some gay men come out to me in saying that they chose to have relationships with men because the sex was better while they were high, or they stated they like guys, but there are a lot of girls they really like. Some have told me they have always liked guys. For me, I don't know why I like the girls I do, I simply see a girl, and like her. Due to the diversity of the answers I have received on the subject, I cannot say why anyone is attracted to what. So, that topic is unsettled, and remains open.
Now, on to reception of homosexuality. As stated above, I have friends that are homosexual. Some are very close to me, and some are mere acquaintances. I believe that very little changes within me when I discover someone is gay or not. It would be naive of me to state nothing changes, because every cause has an effect, but I think that I am adept at continuing to accept that person on the same level, given that they operate (more or less) at the same level I understood them to be. To expound and explain that statement, there has been occasion where I develop a friendship with someone, and after coming out they change a great deal. It may be that they are conforming to what they have always intended of themselves. They may simply be trying to be a different person. I don't know what thoughts they have. This is a rare occurrence, though, so I hardly worry about it. The point I am attempting to make here is that I normally do not let the change in stated attraction change my perception of the person.
Hopefully I have made clear that I am a decently accepting person. So please be patient with me if you are in support of gay marriage. My view of marriage is of the fairly traditional christian view; one man and one woman for the creation of a family. This position IS the Official Stance of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. A common, comically based, argument I hear from promoters of same sex marriage is "well we wouldn't want to ruin the sanctitiy of a marriage like Kim Kardashian, now would we?" in addition to citing the mere days that Britney Spears was married. Another argument is simple; it's not my business or it isn't my responsibility to decide for them and hold them accountable to my rules. Well, that is a fairly good one. However, to counter slightly, when was the last time you ate with a vegan who didn't voice it and then try and sway you to "end the slaughter of animals" or something of the sort? I know it isn't the same, and I know that is a generalization that does not hold true for all, but neither is comparing a diet to marriage or saying all Christians are sexists, racist, warmongers.
I hope I am not coming off as crass, because I'm really trying to not be. I also hope I don't offend any of my dear friends (or any other friends) who hold a different opinion than me. I will freely admit that I am hugely disappointed that the wedding I'm missing this winter is a gay marriage. So please keep in mind; I am not trying to incite anger or start an argument.
To continue; I am greatly offended by the marriages of Kim and Britney. A number of issues have led to the degradation of marriage, most of which I will not touch on here. However, I still hold that I support marriage to be between a man and woman with the intent of creating a family that should carry on for eternity. Here is where another common argument is made; what about a couple that can't have kids? In my mind, it holds that they have the opportunity to create life. I believe in an afterlife that is similar to our life here. I figure that a couple, even if they are unable to have children in this life, will have that chance in the eternities.
My whole view is based on a religious reasoning; I believe in a Plan of Salvation set forth before the creation of the world, and that Plan required our lives on earth to learn, choose, and grow. For us to come to earth, people need to procreate, and bring new life into the world. If it seems as though I am discounting adoption as second hand or unworthy, I am not. I hope to adopt after I have a handful of my own kids (we'll see if I still want 4 of my own kids and another adoption or two after the little rug rats come into the world). A loving family is the basic building block of society. Take a lifespan human development class, or a psych class of any kind. The argument of nature versus nurture is hugely important; are we who we are because of who our parents are, or because of how we were raised? I have always argued vehemently for both sides. Which is stronger, I couldn't say for sure, and that is not a discussion for this time (though I think it has application). The family is hugely important because it is nature, and it should be nurture as well. I was given a training session on borderline personality disorders recently, and there is often a sense of abandonment that is directly associated to the nurture side of the equation. Yet, schizophrenia is generally attributed to genetics. I'm sidetracking here, but lemme get it out this way; family is important for not only supplying the genetic makeup that will influence a child, but also the life experiences of a young person. For these reasons, family is view as a crucial portion of society.
So my progression of personal logic; the Plan of Salvation calls for our lives on earth. The family provides the path to earth in addition to the path through it. So I view marriage as a way to invite new life into the world.
Okay, so in the same way I would attempt to sway people to my political, economic, spiritual, or athletic tendencies, I would also try and let people know how I feel regarding this issue of same sex marriage. I am not attempting to tell them they are wrong. Heck, I have held staunchly to many of my workouts in the face of people around me bulking up because I have learned that the same thing doesn't work for me. It would be asinine of me to assume other people are not the same way. I gain weight when I run. That is not common. I do not hold other people to the same standards or expectations I hold myself to. I will still invite them to those things that have brought me comfort or direction in my life. I do so not to disprove or alienate, but because I have found satisfaction in living that way, and I hope that others can also find it by doing the same thing.
(Written 1/17/15)
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