It's like a hover craft... except nobody wants one!

As an RA, you get to know a whole group of people each and every year. It is almost like living on a Freshman (First Year Student) floor each and every semester of your college career. I lived in sophomore housing once, and it was dreary. No doors were ever open. It was quiet all the time. I was charge up and down the hallways at full speed whenever the Packers scored because I felt there was no risk of anyone EVER being in the halls.

But Freshman floors seem to always have that period of time where everyone comes out of their shell a little bit. Each resident gains a portion of the identity of the floor. Our identity was Mario Kart 64 with tournaments and leader boards. A community is built every year in a way that groups of older students don't build. As an RA, you are able to witness this again and again.

Downsides do exist. The one on my mind today is regarding helicopters. Two immediately come to mind; helicopter parents, who call to argue and complain about a drinking offense or vandalism fine or something of that ilk. The other is a helicopter resident. These first year students, and sometimes older ones as well, latch on to the RA as a friend, and hover around. They work their schedule around eating with the RA, spending time with the RA in the afternoon or evening, even going so far as to ask the RA for advice on fraternities or going to school dances. 

[IThe more I wrote about these students, the more I recognized that I was like this to my freshman RA. I didn't have a roommate, and he was right next door, and I thought he was awesome. Still do. Grant was a freaking awesome guy. Sophomore year, when I was still only 20 years old, a friend gave me a bottle of Capt. Morgan's spiced rum, and (it being my first semester as an RA) I was rather nervous about having alcohol, so I did the logical thing; I CALLED MY RA! Grant was (as usual) awesome about the whole thing. He held on to it for the entire semester, and gave it back once we left. I hope I wasn't a burden on him.]

Helicopter residents knock on the RAs door, walk up to them to have a conversation while they are studying in the library, or try and talk to them while they run on a treadmill or lift in the gym. It puts a peculiar burden on the RAs ability to carry out their duties. I have seen residents like this have almost a complete breakdown when they get in trouble with the RA they thought was their best friend. 

An RA student relationship like this can be trouble. If the person never grows out of that habit, it can be detrimental to establishing fulfilling relationships. I still meet people who cling to others, establishing their self worth around the attention they receive, and acting out in terrible fashion if that attention isn't given.

Don't hover. Don't rate your worth on other's thoughts or attentions.